I walked across the parking lot toward the hospital entrance. I was so excited about my visit, but I hated having to walk inside. I had my mask on and plenty of hand sanitizer in my purse. I had dreaded this day coming with the pandemic in full swing. I could let my thoughts wander to the worst. I could just turn around right now and not go in. Fear was right there knocking, but my faith was stronger each step I took. I prayed again, “Jesus, I ask for your protection over me and this little baby I am carrying, Lord. I know you have good plans for us. Let me be a light and glorify you even now.”
Fear can hold us captive. It can make us stop dead in our tracks and believe the lie that God isn’t really that good, that maybe He doesn’t have good for us right now in this moment. Faith is not stagnant like that. Faith is having active confidence that God is good and He is working for your good because He loves you.
Romans 10:17 says, “So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.” We can grow our faith by spending time with Jesus in His Word and in prayer. The more time we spend with Him, the more our eyes turn from all the things that scare us to the eyes of a Savior who loves us.
Just before I reached the entrance of the hospital with the gloves reaching for me, the thermometer coming close to my face, and the questions about my health starting to pour. A scripture flooded in my heart. I had been meditating on a Psalm. I had made some phone calls to some of our church members earlier that week to pray for them and see if they needed anything. One of them told me to please read Psalm 91. Well during my walks and quiet times that week I had read it over and over, letting it faithfully sink into my heart. Verse 4 came to me in a time when I needed it.
“He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.” Psalm 91:4
I smiled. “Thank you, faithful friend. I know you are always with me.” I walked through those doors in faith with my friend Jesus and we heard my baby’s heartbeat together for the first time. My faith has grown just a little more. The next time fear comes knocking, and it will, I’ll remember to answer with faith.